Tuesday, November 18, 2008

This Just In: Bailout of Big 3 Carmakers

An anonymous source has just announced that the Democrats are going to prove that their proposed bailout of the "big 3 car makers" is not payback to the auto unions for lobbying and donating large sums of money to the Democratic party during the 2008 campaign. To prove that their intent is only to revive struggling businesses that have run their companies into the ground so the economy will once again flourish, no matter what, the Democrats are proposing to bail out the following industries:

8 track tape manufacturers
cassette tape manufacturers
Beta VCR manufacturers
A.M. Radio
Lawn Jart makers
Rotary phone makers
Delorian cars
Eastern Airlines
Pan Am Airlines
Laser disc makers
The Pinto
The Edsel
Leg warmer and headband manufacturers

Proving to the world that if you run a failing company, don't invest your earnings into R&D to create new products that the population will want to buy, and are such a failure that even venture capitalists don't want to invest in your future, that the people's tax dollars will save them instead... for another month or so and then they'll come begging for more of the people's hard earned money.


Tracey and Huffle said...

Yay they're bringing back disco! (What is a lawn jart?).

Painter Pack said...

I always liked cassette tapes!! And Disco!!