Funny title for a blog... unless you’ve tried to buy shoe laces (shoe strings depending on your locale) lately. Have you tried buying them lately? Really? Where did you get them, because apparently in the state of Maryland YOU CAN’T F’ING FIND THEM IN STORES!!!!!!
Seriously! You would think that shoe stores would sell them. NO, they sell shoes. Apparently their mad marketing skills told shoe store owners that selling shoe laces for $1.99 a pair isn’t the way to keep your store open, so don’t sell them and then people will be forced to simply buy a new pair of shoes when their cheap laces break. I kid you not, go into any of the conglomerate chain store shoe stores and I DARE YOU to find shoe laces (in the state of Maryland, that is). There are no shoe laces to be had in any shoe store in the ENTIRE FREAKING STATE OF MARYLAND!
Ok, FINE! We go to Men’s Wearhouse where we bought the stupid shoes... guess what? Yep, they don’t sell shoe laces. Are you FREAKIN kidding me! Oh yeah, you can probably get some tricked out expensive sneaker laces for your incredibly expensive you could buy a car for that price professional athlete hawked specialty shoes, but not plain brown stupid dress shoe laces. I suppose hubby could put a pair of pink neon fluorescent laces in his brown dress shoes, but really?
I came home and googled shoe laces. Guess who has them! No, really, guess! I insist that you guess. YES you can bid on shoe laces on e-bay! Are you serious? I have to buy freaking shoe laces on e-bay? Is that what the world has come to? Seriously? I can’t find local shoe laces so I’m forced to bid on shoe laces online.
Please tell me that Maryland is the only place where you have to waste $75.00 of gas to drive miles and miles to freakin find ONE PLACE that sells brown dress shoe shoe laces? Please tell me that there are other states that haven’t completely lost their sanity and you can actually walk into a shoe store and say “Do you have a pair of brown men’s dress shoe shoe laces?” and they don’t look at you as if you are suggesting they just shutter up their business and live on the streets or throw you out of the store because who in their right mind would break a shoe lace and expect to replace it for $1.99 when they can spend $150 on a new pair of mens’ dress shoes???? Is there such a place, because frankly if I could sell my house in this crap economy, and if I could afford to drive out of this state, I would do it... just so I could buy a pair of freakin brown shoe laces for no reason whatsoever.