Friday, August 05, 2005

Runaway Bride Rant

I'm not sure this is true or not, but apparently the Today Show mentioned that the Runaway Bride (AKA: Jennifer Wilbanks) and her fiance were indeed going to get married... FINALLY.

My first reaction "who f'ing cares?"

Also, apparently, the Today show mentioned where they were registered, and hinted how nice it would be for them to get all of their stuff. Since I didn't see it, I don't want to claim that they actually told people to go out and buy them all the stuff they wanted, but that's the gist of what I was told.

Something else about it was mentioned on a local newscast, and (I laughed my butt off) one of the newscasters said "I bet she's registered at Greyhound". I'm sure HE will catch crap for saying that (since he's a man and all, picking on a poor demented young woman).

Since I didn't know where they were registered, curiosity got the best of me, and I chose to look at Macy's. Sure enough, there they are, registered, and still registered under the original wedding date... how nice.

I looked at what they wanted, and threw up.

A Waterford Lismore Ice Bucket for $250????
A $250 Ice Bucket? Who needs an ice bucket that costs TWO FIFTY??? Does it create ice with no electrical means? No! It just sits there and hold ice. What do you do with a $250 ice bucket? WHY would you need an ice bucket that costs that much?

The answer is: to match the Waterford Lismore Pitcher that costs $225.00!!!!!!!

How about the $130 tablespoon? They also want 12 sets of the 5 piece dinner flatware. TWELVE sets? at $360 a pop? That's $4,320 bucks worth of freakin silverware!

$225 for a cake platter (better be some damn good cake).

My all time favorite is the $140 gravy boat (on sale for $111.99, get it while you can).

On a personal rant, I feel that gravy boats are the biggest waste of money imaginable. Who uses them? You heat the gravy in the microwave and use a regular spoon. What idiot in these days has time to heat up gravy (let alone make it from scratch), dirty up one dish, then pour it in a gravy boat and dirty up another dish. Typically if I'm invited to weddings, I get them the gravy boat. If you ask for it, I get it because its stupid. If you don't ask for it and I give it to you, it's because I don't like you. I want everyone to remember me by thinking "why did we ever get this stupid gravy boat?"

Ok, so back to blanket head woman.

There's a general rule for picking out stuff for registries: If you can't afford it, don't put it on your stupid registry, if you can afford it, go out and freakin buy it because half of your friends can't freakin afford it. Another general rule is: if you can't afford it and you put it on your registry, then everyone laughs at you because you're a pig in a suit. That's probably why she ran in the first place.

Oink

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